How to Spot a Gold Digger

For men the myth of the Gold Digger is as real as life itself, yet as elusive and terrifying as the spirits that float through the graveyards at night. Most guys either know of someone who has gone toe to toe with the demon and perished in court or they themselves have financially escaped from the beast’s sharp fangs; left alive only to deliver a warning to others.

Every day in America fathers pull their sons aside after dinner to inform them of the existence of the Gold Digger. Take heed. Be cautious. Trust no one. Doubt everyone. It is during these late night whispers that fathers tell the horrible stories of lost fortunes and dreams crushed.

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com
Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com

Like eerie ghosts floating through dark houses, visions of the beast takes hold of their sons’ imaginations like vice grips and refuse to let go.

On the other hand women will deny the existence of the beast. To them it is another example of how stupid and selfish men have become. To most women a man’s duty is to provide for the family. It has been that way since the days of old. Men earn and physically sacrifice for the comfort of the family. There is no ghost involved.

There are no financial boogie-women. If a man loses his fortune in the court system it’s because he’s at fault; otherwise why would the courts award the woman with so much money?

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com
Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com

Many women feel that the term “Gold Digger” is another way for men to further chauvinist views. Why blame the woman for your inability to take financial control of your lives? And with the emergence of female job independence and the slow, steady fading of chivalry, who really needs a man? Women can do it for themselves.

So who is right?

First let’s define what a Gold Digger is. Not the Webster’s version but the common man’s idea of the term.

A Gold Digger is a female or male that has money as the primary motivator for entering relationships. They are willing to sacrifice their bodies on a sexual level. They will date a man or woman no matter the age, appearance, or emotional stability. They lie about their feelings simply to gain the trust of the target. Once the trust is earned they then apply pressure through guile and sex to get that person to spend money on them in large amounts.

So now that we’ve defined what a Gold Digger is, does it actually exist?

Unfortunately the answer is a resounding, yes! Gold Diggers didn’t just pop up overnight. They have been around since the biblical days. Anytime you mix people, money, and sex you’re going to get a group of people that are willing to cut corners and exploit for maximum value.

Yes, the Gold Digger does exist, although they may not be so easy to spot as one might think. One of the trademarks of Gold Diggers is that they are masters of camouflage.

Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com
Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com

Their intentions are always cloaked until those intentions can no longer be hidden from the pain of financial manipulation. But by that time the Gold Digger has stuffed their coffers and bounced on to the next victim.

Is it as bad as people think?

Yes! It absolutely is. But it’s not for the reason you may believe. What makes the situation so bad is the way in which the behavior has permeated society in general. It can no longer just be assigned to one gender (nor has it ever really been one gender). Now men are gold digging just as much as women (if not more). Men do it with such reckless abandon that they often brag about it as a badge of honor. Also as alternative lifestyles have become more acceptable, the Gold Digger has made their presence felt in that arena too. You see, it does not matter what you’re into, your age or your sexuality…. It’s about GREEN. It’s about Money. And as governments find more ways to tax you, food prices become higher and more people fall into poverty, people are opting to use their God given beauty to gain financial support.

So what are the signs of a Gold Digger? I’m going to be fair with this one. Since men and women can both be guilty, I’m going to offer 5 signs for both men and women. Here are 5 Ways to Spot a Gold Digger:

For The Women Who Encounter a Male Gold Digger:

  1. He’s always broke: A real man never borrows and seldom likes to even be seen in a weak financial position. It is the main reason men have a hard time telling women if they lose their jobs.
    Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com
    Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com

    Financial stability is a serious thing for men. But if you’re dating a guy and he stays on empty, it might be a sign that he’s using you to supplement his income aka gold digging.

 

  1. He wants a joint bank account: It’s not uncommon for two people who live together or are married to have a joint bank account. You want to share and grow together. But if you’re dating a man and he opens his mouth to recommend opening a joint bank account? Run! Because it’s probably not going to stop there. Next thing you know he’s asking about your social security number and trying to get things in your name without your knowledge.
  1. He wants you to cosign: It’s almost as bad as the joint bank account. He’ll give you some wishy-washy story about not having this or needing that. And all the while he’s handling his business in a major way in the bedroom, your head is cloudy and not thinking about what he’s really after. Leaving you on the hook for a luxury item he can’t afford.
  1. Relationship expert for hire: If you’re just getting to know this guy he probably seems like a good catch; intelligent, sexy, a master in the bedroom. But you notice that he’s asking a lot of personal questions about your ex. A lot! Not only that, he’s offering you pseudo advice on what a “real woman” should do for her man.
    Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com
    Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com

    And it just so happens that one of those things that he believes a “real woman” should do for her man is buy all of his clothing (and turning over all finances to the man is in close second). He’s getting settled into your head. He wants to know what motivates you so he can manipulate you to get what he wants.

  1. An emergency every…single…week: One week his car broke down. The next week he had to cancel his credit cards because they were stolen. Another week he was in between paychecks but he needed to fly to Miami to see his sick grandmother before she died. Another week…. The list goes on and on with this guy.
    Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com
    Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com

    One emergency after another just seems to pop up. Either this guy has the worst luck on earth or he’s a black hole for your income. The lies become more and more convincing as your bank account dwindles and your stupidity is on bigger display. Stay away.

For The Men Who Encounter a Female Gold Digger:

  1. Excessive questions about finances: If you’ve just met someone the flow of the conversation rarely touches finances. It’s usually something along the lines of what you plan on doing with your career in the future. Rarely do you stay focused on the internal workings of your net worth and what credit cards are in your wallet. If you ever encounter someone with that kind of interest, back off. They’re usually gold digging.

 

  1. You pay for everything…with no objections: If you’re a man, taking a woman out and footing the bill is nothing new. It’s almost a part of the routine. But be careful.
    Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com
    Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com

    No one who is genuinely interested in getting to know you is going to feel okay with you paying for everything all of the time. Men and women usually both are observant about those uncomfortable situations and try to at least make an offer to carry the bill. But someone that NEVER pays? That person is who you need to watch out for.

  1. Too much knowledge about the in crowd: Everyone’s connected to something exclusive…to a point. You’re not going to do too much bragging about where you’ve been or the exclusive clubs you can get into unless you’ve had a lot of experience riding at the expense (or access) of others.
    Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com
    Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com

    If he or she has been to too many exclusive clubs or knows the bouncers by name, yeah it could mean some trouble.

  1. Wills and probate: Death is a part of life. That’s just how it goes. But rarely are you asked about who owns what in your family. No one is interested in who has you in their will and how much you stand to gain. That is….usually. If you come across someone asking about property values of parents and which grandma may have you in her will, you’d better prepare for the worst.
  1. Victim of retail: Her shoes cost $11,000. Her jeans cost $1000. Her purse costs $3000. Notice something here?
    Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com
    Photo courtesy of Shutterstock.com

    If she owns more high-end brands than she does normal gear, she’d better have a nice job to support such a fetish. If she doesn’t, she had to get it somewhere. And more than likely it came from….

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